Support groups create camaraderie

Imagine a high school student body void of any emotions. Difficult right?

Stereotypically speaking, teenagers are emotional wrecks, without any control over their hormone crazed fervor. This out of control stereotype, however, is in no way the reality for most students.

We teenagers actually are quite crafty at keeping our emotions inward in order to survive. We are masters of stuffing the truth of our struggles in favor of not appearing weak or vulnerable. There are of course moments of honest connection throughout our day, but the majority of our time as high-schoolers, regardless of how “together” we may seem, is in part a balancing act of comparing our problems to others in order to minimize the significance of our struggles.

Before I moved to Whitefish, Whitefish High School psychologist Robin Bissell, and a few other members of the Whitefish school system, came together in response to a community wide tragedy. They realized that the students of our community were not receiving adequate emotional support.

This group of concerned members, with insight from, Bissell, Jen Vilar and Lacey Eccles, created the Student Assistance Program to provide a resource where all students can turn. Students can refer themselves and do not need to be defined as high risk in order to participate.

There are separate groups for students struggling with concerns of substance abuse, coping with grief, or simply going through the strenuous and normal process of being human. In SAP, no advice is given, no questions are asked and no one is expected to act anything but respectful.

My admiration goes out to the community for embracing the idea of this holistic care approach for students and having the courage to go where no school in the world has gone by starting a student assistance program with student co-facilitators.

In order to be a co-facilitator, students go through a three-day intensive training where we learn empathy and concrete skills of reserving judgment as well as the universal effects that physiological stressors have on students.

Throughout my time in SAP, both as a co-facilitator and member, I have changed my perception of what it means to be healthy. Mental health does not mean having it all together, or that problems are only important if they are the most extreme in the group.

Thinking this way is emotionally isolating and potentially destructive. SAP participants consistently offer feedback that a key benefit of finding camaraderie within the similar threads of our stories dilutes feelings of isolation and helps foster empathy and build personal empowerment. Vulnerability does not equate weakness and quality support can be found with both peers and teachers.

Today, I will do my best to listen without judgment, offer no criticism and be empathetic to both myself and my peers. Shazam, bam, boom, kapow.

Student facilitator training dates for this year are March 5-7. If interested, contact Jen Vilar at the high school.

— Grace Kurtz is a senior at Whitefish High School.