Charles the Simple, et al.

G. GEORGE OSTROM / For the Hungry Horse News

It seems a minor thing to ponder, but can't help wondering how long it might take to completely read a book that begins millions of years B.C., and runs to 1989? May never find out, but am trying.

It is difficult to imagine the years of vast research required to compile "Chronicle of the World." The book's intro covers prehistoric geology and biology, followed by facts gained from anthropological data and gets amazingly specific around 3,000 B.C. as humans learned to write. The book is cumbersome … not for bathroom reading. Small print crams more than a million words on 1,350 oversized pages. There are 3,000 illustrations, a separate history of each country, and ends with a 50-page index listing tens of thousand of notable individuals and events from the entire world through the centuries.

Assuming some of you may not be reading this book, it seems my duty to share a few historical tidbits along with personal observations.

"In 898 A.D., Charles the Simple was recognized as King of France." Charles the Simple??? That's how early historians labeled celebs. Seems sorta disrespectful, but was common practice. Up north, Harold the Fairhair was victorious at Hafrsfjord in 900 this becoming Norway's first king. Eleven years later, Louis the Child died so nobles elected Conrad of Francouis as replacement in Lorraine, but Charles the Simple came with his troops and took over the Province.

In 923 Charles the Simple killed rebel leader Robert the Troublesome but lost the Battle of Soissons, so the rebels chose Ralph of Burgundy as leader and put Charles the Simple in prison. Didn't find more on Charles, but he did last longer than most rulers of those times.

On the other side of the world during 939, Vietnam gained independence after 1,000 years under Chinese rule. In the North Atlantic, Eric the Red was exiled from Iceland for killing somebody in a fight over bedsprings. He fled with his crew and discovered a good hideout in 982, then sneaked back to Iceland to tell everyone how wonderful his new place was. To add believability to his discovery, Eric called it "Greenland." (The latest National Geographic has an amazing article on Greenland and that's what got me back to reading "The Chronicle.")

In 991 England, Olaf the Norseman raided Maldon and advanced deep into land ruled by Aethebed the Unready. Olaf got help from Dave Sweyn but still couldn't take London; however, Aethebed the Unready and his allies paid "tribute" for Oaf to back off. Wild Norskies were all over in those days including Ireland where in 1014, the Irish defeated Vikings at the battle of Clomtorf, but their King, Brian Boru, was killed.

Skipping eight centuries ahead in "The Chronicle" to 1826, we're reminded that two authors of America's Declaration of Independence and former presidents, John Adams and Thomas Jefferson, both died on the fiftieth anniversary of our freedom, the Fourth of July. Also in America, in 1833 Samuel Colt invented a revolver. It was the first handgun which could shoot repeatedly, thus preparing gunslingers for winning the west.

England began regulating railroads in 1836. Parliament enacted a law setting a maximum of five mph for trains and there had to be a person walking in front of the engine carrying a red flag. We assume they picked people who could walk fast and not stumble much.

There was bad U.S.A. news in 1837. Fifteen thousand Mandan, Hidatsa and Arikan Indians died in the Dakotas from small pox, which was brought up the Missouri on an American Fur Company steamboat. Along with good news, there is a lot of bad news in "Chronicle of the World."

Looking back to 1836 in Europe, I found a relative from my mother's ancestral Scottish clan. John McAdam died in Dumfriesshire at age 80. John was a banker's son but spent his career experimenting with ways to improve roads, when as a young man he was appointed Road Trustee. He found a way to make better surfaces using "broken" rocks mixed with a binder such as tar or asphalt. That method is called McAdamized. Modern dictionaries have added an extra a to his name, making it MacAdam, but still the same guy.

Two hundred years ago, they probably called him … "John the Paver."

G. George Ostrom is a Kalispell resident and a national award-winning Hungry Horse News columnist.