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Who is Ed Hardy, anyway?

| February 4, 2009 10:00 PM

About a month ago a friend of mine from back East said, “Join Facebook, everyone is doing it.”

Facebook, for the uninitiated, is a free social network Web site, supported by ridiculous advertising like ”Make $92 an hour in a part-time job,” or “Experience the Rolling Razor.”

Yeah, that’s what my butt needs, a rolling razor. And let me tell you, if part-time gigs really paid 92 bucks an hour, who would have a full-time job?

At any rate, the idea of Facebook is to keep in contact with old and new friends without running up an enormous phone bill.

To that end, I suppose it works. But anyone can ask to be your friend and many of the friends

I’ve added I haven’t actually spoken with in 20-plus years and some I never talked to even when we were walking down the same halls of the same high school.

Not that they would want to talk to me anyway — take Jody P., for example. In sixth grade I decided to make my own Valentine’s Day cards, seeing as I was both:

A) Cheap.

B) Creative.

Jody’s card on the front, said, “You’re Divine.” Open it up and it said, “You swine.”

Then I drew a cute little picture of a pink pig.

Mr. Reek, my sixth grade teacher saw the card, took offense, and sent me to detention. Valentine’s Day 1979 was officially ruined. As for Jody, I can’t say — I mean, she was a little fat, so the swine reference wasn’t that far off the mark.

As my high school career continued, I pretty much offended anyone with two legs at some point, so the fact that anyone would want to be friends with me now is quite astonishing.

Beyond that, however, Facebook can also degenerate quickly into mindless drivel.

For example, as I write this, “Karen is listening to some rowdy Buckeye fans in the basement” —

“Sheri is hoping the weather holds out until school is out” — and “Amy is a fan of Ed Hardy.”

I know what you’re thinking: Who the hell is Ed Hardy?

On top of all of this are photos after photos of people holding beers, mixed drinks or their kids — or sometimes all three.

All of this could be viewed as the sad state of affairs of my generation.

But I have more faith.

I, too, will become a fan of Ed Hardy. Just you watch.

Chris Peterson is the photographer for the Hungry Horse News.