Hader's Fishin' Yarn

Had a fine visit with Richard Hader this week. Had never met him before but knew right off he was a very wise and insightful man. Came to my house to tell me he had carefully saved and preserved every single issue of the Kalispell Weekly News for the eight years I had owned and published it, 1974 to 1982. He kindly offered to give me the collection.

During our visit Richard added bonus points to my opinion of him by saying he had pulled a string of pack mules years ago on Glacier Park trails under the supervision of the famous packer and yarn spinner, Bill Yenne.

Told me he grew up in the Flathead and had to move away to make a living, but at last retired from his career at Vancouver, Wash., returning to the valley he loves. We exchanged yarns and memories. Toward the end of our visit — and I might add, “with a straight face,” Richard related the following story about a couple he “remembers” who once had a cabin at Lake Blaine:

Mr. Smith was an avid fisherman so he kept a boat out there and spent lots of time on the water. Mrs. Smith wasn’t into angling but loved the peaceful rural atmosphere and sometimes joined her husband on the lake to keep him company and enjoy the views.

On this particular day, Mr. Smith had worked hard the day before and after fishing an hour or so without much luck, told his wife he felt like going back to the cabin for a nap. Mrs. Smith told him she was enjoying the lake and decided she’d just go boating by herself for awhile. She hadn’t been out very long when a patrolling game warden pulled alongside in an outboard and he asked to see her fishing license.

Mrs. Smith said, “I don’t need a license because I’m not fishing.”

The warden disagreed, “The evidence says differently. You have the equipment.”

She glanced down at the fishing pole her husband left in the boat along with a net, bait can and tackle box, then told the warden, “Just because the ‘equipment’ is here doesn’t mean I’m fishing.”

The warden was growing impatient and delivered and ultimatum, “M’am, if you do not show me your fishing license, I am going to issue you a citation.”

Mrs. Smith looked him right in the eye and said, “Write me a ticket, and I will say you sexually assaulted me.”

“That’s ridiculous! I haven’t even touched you.”

“That is true,” she said, “But … You’ve got the equipment.”

Soon as he had finished his amazing yarn of yesteryear, there was no doubt in my mind … new friend Richard had spent some time around Bill Yenne.

That story triggered my recollection regarding a trio of young ladies who once operated a clothes-mending shop at Western Outdoors in Kalispell. On the back wall was an official looking sign which said, “Sexual Harassment will not be reported — but … You Will be Graded.”

Life is good. See ya next week.

G. George Ostrom is a Kalispell resident and a national-award winning Hungry Horse News columnist.