No time for bitterness

Having been labeled, "categorically undatable," I feel uniquely qualified to address a few of Lindsey Nelson's opinion article remarks from the Dec. 9 Pilot. I am selfish and I fear commitment; false commitment, that is. Why

is it that because my priorities don't coincide with yours, I am insecure?

I ski and drink, a lot, by any standards. But a coward?! Please. I moved, as many of us "boys" did, from the East Coast a decade ago, to enjoy life in a mountain town. I have grown to embrace a lifestyle where my focus is to relish the mountains and the people that have also chosen to live amidst them. It is our choice to live in this beautiful valley, appreciating the sun when we see it, accepting the rain, fog, and yes, different dating scenarios. I am not here to be defensive, bitter, or make personal attacks, this being such a small town and all. Apparently, however, there is a need to state what I had considered givens:

Whitefish is a ski town. Often, in a ski town, you will find people who ski and ride. Why am I being chided for committing to an activity I am passionate about?! The dating scene is perilous nation-wide. HBO did a little show on it, Sex and the City. Most people did not move to Whitefish to have discourse on disastrous dating scenarios. Many moved here to enjoy an active outdoor lifestyle. I moved here to try to learn to ski (which still hasn't happened yet), and found myself surrounded by the kindest, most sincere men and women I have ever met, anywhere. Friends Jamie, Lisa, Heidi, Courtney, Amy, Kristen, Pam, Sarah, Carrie, and Holly might suggest that they, too love to ski, maybe even drink a PBR(or six), and indeed, may even have found their good men… in, of all places, a bar. If you're tired of meeting skier/barflys, maybe you shouldn't go to bars. You offered little insight into the world of "boys in ski towns," and certainly no solutions. There are other environments to meet people in, coffeehouses, bookstores, music venues, churches, bowling alleys, Red Cross blood drives, even Laundromats, to name a few. Reportedly, "men," wash their clothes regularly. If you meet a "boy" that actually likes you, not only will he likely accommodate your dinner "like proper dating," he may even surprise you with a dog sledding adventure, snowshoeing, cross country skiing, ice skating, a fly fishing lesson, a concert, or a show put on by the Whitefish Theater Company.

Rather than wallowing in the difficulties of wading through the morass of "boys," perhaps you could say something to the man buying bread at the grocery store: "Hi, great day in the 'Fish, isn't it?" seems appropriate.

Ryan Friel

Skier/barfly